What exactly gives us permission to speak freely?
Do we have creative license to speak into everyone’s lives?
These questions have been swirling in my head for weeks… maybe even months.
Who has a right to speak into your life?
Do you allow just anyone to critique you or give you advice?
I am just going to say it… NOT everyone has permission to speak into your life. Just because someone knows you does not give them creative license to critique what you say, do or think period!!
The people who have permission to speak into your life are those people who are doing life with you. The people who love you and listen to what is going on in your life. The people who know you beyond your tweets, posts or blogs. The people who are with you in the arena bloody, bruised and scarred from doing life with you in a real and authentic way.
We have to be careful whom we allow to speak into our lives. I have found myself on occasion mulling over an email or message for far longer than necessary. Words have more power than we sometimes realize. They have the power to make us question our intentions, our calling and our hearts. Words have the power to tear us up and steal our joy.
What can we do to protect our hearts and minds?
Set Boundaries.
Boundaries can be hard when it comes to family and people you use to be close with yet, boundaries are necessary for your mental, emotional and spiritual health. Learning to protect yourself is imperative for healthy growth and development
Be Selective.
Be selective with whom you trust. Being authentic, vulnerable and real with someone who is always breaking your trust or being overly critical of you is not going to end up well for your thought life.
Take Time.
Take time to think, pray and talk with someone you trust before responding to a message that is causing you conflict inside. When you answer too soon it is more emotional than anything and usually starts a chain of back and forth which means no one gets heard. Taking time to process their words and your own reaction will make the situation easier to handle and also you will be able to sleep better at night.
Be You.
I use to allow what people said to me really twist me up inside. I would sit and ponder comebacks and ways of getting in my own digs. This method just left me sad and frustrated. I am still learning how to communicate an end to these situations and I wish I could say it was easy but, sadly it is not always easy. The best advice I can give is to keep being you and trust God to lead your reactions.
If you reason with an arrogant cynic, you’ll get slapped in the face; confront bad behavior and get a kick in the shins. So don’t waste your time on a scoffer; all you’ll get for your pains is abuse. But if you correct those who care about life, that’s different—they’ll love you for it! Save your breath for the wise—they’ll be wiser for it; tell good people what you know—they’ll profit from it. Skilled living gets its start in the Fear-of-God, insight into life from knowing a Holy God. It’s through me, Lady Wisdom, that your life deepens, and the years of your life ripen. Live wisely and wisdom will permeate your life; mock life and life will mock you. Proverbs 9:10 MSG
There are plenty of times I have thought about bringing down my website and deleting all social media from my phone and life. I know this would only give me peace for a little bit because I love learning through playing with words. And I know I have to live in my true self even if it makes people uncomfortable. And you need to learn to live in your truth in order to find freedom from the negative voices inside and outside of your mind.
Be bold. Be brave. Be you!
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